Everything is relative...........

For the last two weeks I have been researching my family tree. My last name is the 3rd most popular name in the U.S, but my great grandfather, luckily enough, had a very unusual given name. His name was Friend. We thought maybe he was a Quaker, a Mennonite or Amish. As it turns out, his family were just a bunch of fruit loops. Old Friend Clarence had an Uncle named Goshorn. I've been spending a lot of time trying to figure out how one would pronounce that name with out sounding like a complete dumb ass. Is it Gosh-orn, Gos-horn, Go-shorn, maybe the o is long and he's goos-horn, goo-shorn, but you know, his nick name had to be Gosh. So if some one was expressing surprise at him, they would've without a doubt exclaimed Gosh, Gosh! or Golly Gosh, Gosh! or Gosh Golly (gee wiz) Gosh!
Another possible relative was named Sleeze. And by Gosh, I'm serious, someone named the poor child Sleeze. We have an assortments of Georges, James, Rachels, Ellas, Alberts, Marys and lots of Catherines and Anns. Catherine was extremely popular. But, hey at least Catherine was a real name and not something cute and made up by a trendy, oh my gosh I have to be different than everyone else, let's spell it wrong! mother of today. And really I'm sorry, but, if you have one of those names, you know it's true, so don't get your panties in a wad and don't throw stuff at me. It's just that I prefer stripper names for my children. Alright, I didn't set out to give the poor thing a stripper name, I really wanted to give her a hippie name like Aura or Ariana or Jasmine. Yes, right or wrong, I really wanted Jasmine Blue, I wanted to call her Jazzy when she was small and Jazz when she grew up.
Oh well, she has a beautiful name, given to her by her brother and too bad all those strippers vilified it and of course my deepest apologies if any strippers happen to stop by. I should also say I have a poor child who has a trendy, popular name that is misspelled. I will say in my defense however, he was named this name before it was trendy and it is misspelled because his mother had a brain freeze. But hey, I had just been through 48 hours of labor, spent 10 of those hours at drill (Army), 6 hours of intense labor, watched Beetlejuice for the upmteenth time and refused drugs for my pain, I wasn't exactly in the mood for a spelling bees.
Anyway, I have met my 5th cousin, trying to find the proverbial needle in a hay stack, and he has sent me a picture of my GreatX2 grandmother when she was a wee lassie and also a picture of my GreatX3 grandparents. Real treasures that I am so lucky to have.
It's also interesting to note, that even though he and I are 4 or 5 generations apart, we still look enough alike to be, well cousins, by golly by gosh.
People love and respect each other, because I tell you true, we're all relative.